R is for resistance

“The more important to your soul’s growth, the stronger the resistance will be.” - Steven Pressfield

What goal are you shying away from pursuing because you lack confidence, Ishwariya Rajamohan?

It’s easily done - when the voice in your mind tells you that you are not good enough, the last thing you want is for everyone else on your team to discover that too.

But that voice was never about your growth or expansion.

It only cares about keeping you safe, even though there is a part of you that knows you should be in a more senior role by now, earning a higher wage, running bigger projects and leading bigger teams.

Steven Pressfield goes on to say that when the stakes are the highest, you will get hit with waves of “resistance with a capital R” that make you procrastinate or avoid taking action.

I see it also taking shape in other ways in women: your biggest doubts and fears show up internally, telling you how incapable and undeserving you are, right when you are ready to uplevel and need to demonstrate your competence and value externally.

So you put off advocating for yourself or having the difficult conversations around promotions, pay rises, more responsibility, even when you know you are ready for those things.

But you see, it’s much more complicated than just being ready.

What decision makers want to see is not so much that you are perfect for the role, but that you can handle the pressure of what growing into that next role involves.

Now you don’t need to take on that mental load all by yourself.

The smart way to go about it is to keep your headspace and energy for your performance, the steep learning curve you will encounter and keeping your mind sharp and attentive.

But outsource the figuring it all out to an ally: a coach, manager or mentor who believes in you more than you do in yourself, helping you navigate your way through the maze of challenges and difficulties that goes with stepping into your next level.

Now they all bring different things to the table (although this is a generalisation):

• Your manager can bring accountability by creating the conditions for you to step up and grow before you feel ready, but they can expect you to figure out the mindset and strategy for yourself;

• A mentor is great for strategy because they most likely have already conquered the heights that you have set your sights on achieving, but again the mindset will be up to you and you will have to hold yourself to account with implementing the advice that they share with you;

• A coach who is professionally trained to give you all three things to achieve your goal: build your mindset for the long haul, help you figure out the right strategy to fit your values and personality, and hold you to account when going after your goal gets hard and you feel ready to quit.

  
  

Whoever you choose, make sure you choose the right ally for this journey.

If you are looking for a coach, then let’s have a conversation about how you can achieve your goal. I have been helping women with stepping into their next career level since 2021, and my coaching is always bespoke and tailored to you as a professional, your unique circumstances and how you want to shape your career journey. (I only have 6 spots left for 2025.)