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Asking for what you want

Yes, it takes confidence to ask for what you want.

This message is for you if you are negotiating a raise or a promotion, taking on more responsibility at work, or putting together a proposal for a new client.

It is easy to get very caught up in worrying about how your request will be received. This is very natural, because it takes vulnerability to ask for something that means a lot to you. But then you risk losing sight of your end goal if you don’t also view this process as an experience to gain useful feedback.

Here are my suggestions:

1. Be very clear about what exactly you want.

2. Ask for feedback if the answer is ‘no'.

3. Find out what would have made it a 'yes'.

4. Then, and only then, decide what to do about the outcome.

Make sure you follow this framework all the way through before deciding whether you need to course-correct or find another way to meet your requirement.


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